Chapter One

Today’s post is a simple, selfish one.

Today’s post is a marker on the calendar and a a totem of remembrance to the day that I finished the first chapter of a first draft on a first book.

It’s a small step, but it’s been a grueling big one that I want to remember.

I want to remember overcoming the obstacles of believing I have a voice, believing that I have what it takes to to a writer and believing I have words to share that might relate to someone else, even just one person who may feel alone in their thoughts.

That’s why I write. So others don’t feel alone and to share a story that might be relateable, even if it’s just to one other person.

So, cheers friends. Thank you for reading and being a part of this journey.

On to the next one.

-Cliff

Cliff’s note: You have what it takes.

Markers

It felt like I was holding two small ponds, one in each hand, and as I looked down at the floor underneath the chair I was sitting, I saw two bodies of water forming from the dripping springs that were my hands above. As the artist continued to drive a needle into my wrists, my friend Cole sat next to me looking at the puddles of sweat forming under the both of us, and glancing at me, informed me that he would grab some paper towels.

Cole and I were lifeguards together at a local indoor pool, and he was one of those friends who was always up for anything. When I asked him to tag along with me to go get my first tattoos, he was all in. This was great because I knew I didn’t want to go by myself, and I would have someone to listen to angsty screamo music with the entire way there.

Growing up, I never thought that I would be someone who would get tattoos. Tattoos were only for people who rode motorcycles, played professional sports or were in rock bands. As a boy in small-town Oklahoma, my body was a temple, and I was terrified of needles, so getting a permanent marking on my skin was never something that crossed my mind. But then again, growing up never goes as planned, does it?

It’s funny how sometimes we get ideas to do things from the least expected places. I got the idea for my first tattoo sitting in a Sunday school class my junior year of high school.

We were watching a video series by, Rob Bell. In this particular video, he was planting two trees - one on each side of him. At the end of the video he stood between them and explained how each tree represented the Tree of Life found in Genesis and Revelation. The tree in Genesis representing the beginning of time, and the tree in Revelation was representing the end of time. That’s when it hit me: symbolism says a lot.

We live in funny world. It’s a world that frowns upon talking about religion, politics and things that actually matter, but adores talking about the weather, sports and neighborhood gossip. Which makes sense to an extent. The deeper the discussed issue, the more opportunity there is for disagreement. It’s easy to talk about things we know we can all agree on.

Looking back, I think the mindset of ignoring life’s ‘life-changing’ topics was engrained into us at an early age. The biggest cartoons were always filled with sticks of dynamite and falling anvils, not real-life problems that we may actually have to face one day. To talk about anything real sends up red flags. But that’s half the battle. The real war starts when we try to pull down those flags and pursue genuine knowledge of our neighbors.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Symbolism speaks in ways we can’t.

Mondays

My friend Copan thinks Monday is the best day of the week. No kidding. Every week, rain or shine, hell or high water, he’ll send a Tweet out to the masses with a ,“THANK GOD IT’S MONDAY,” attached to it with some sort of excited GIF and encouraging message.

And I absolutely love this.

For so long, Monday’s have gotten a bad wrap. After all, they’re the start of the work week, which brings along waking up early, grinding on projects for eight hours, long commutes, stress, so on and so forth. But I think Copan may be on to something. While it’s true, Monday is the start of the work week, it’s also the start to a lot of other greatness too.

I was asking Copan about his perspective on his Mondays and how he seems to be one of the most positive people I know, and he spoke some truth into me that I needed to be reminded of: Any day of the week, Monday included, is the start of new opportunities. Opportunities to do good and experience greatness, while Monday’s alone signal the start to all our weeks have to offer.

Sure, that meeting at 3p on Tuesday may be something you’re dreading, but at least you have a job. And what about dinner on Tuesday night with all your friends and that a new episode of your favorite show comes out on Thursday? Oh, and there’s going to be a great basketball game on Wednesday night too.

Thank God for Mondays. Thank God for fresh starts. Thank God for opportunities.

-Cliff

Copan’s Note: Always thank God for Mondays.

The Grueling Pursuit of Passion

This morning, I was reflecting on one of the best feelings a person can have. The feeling when you’re doing what you know you’re supposed to be doing.

Growing up, I always loved seeing my friends get a long, especially when I happened to be the one to introduce those friends to one another. I always got a lot of joy watching a mate from one friend group enter into the circle of another friend group, only to have the two friend groups mesh together and create a massive, new friend group. I wouldn’t have called it this one I was 12, but it was a passion, and when you’re a teenager and you start to grow up, you begin to wonder how you can translate your passions into jobs and your jobs into careers, but my passion, obviously, was pretty unique.

What was I going to do with this weird passion I had of convening people and watching them form friendships out of those introductions? I certainly wasn’t going to pursue a career in match-making, but surely there had to be something out there ‘where my greatest joy met the world’s greatest need,’ as the great Frederick Buechner said. After all, I highly doubted the world needed another match-maker (although Bumble and Tender turned out to be pretty successful), but surely, the world needed something that fit what I loved to do.

And it did, and it still does. It just always looks a little different for each season of life, as the world changes and as I change. But really, there’s no feeling quite like the first time life hits the nail on the head for you and you get a phone call that says, “Yes, we’ve got a job that fits exactly what you’re describing.”

Whatever that may be for you as you pursue finding that passion and purpose, I pray that you sit in that, ‘Aha!’ feeling of finding that illusive happiness. And it may be a lifelong pursuit, but don’t stop. It’s worth every second.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: The pursuit of finding your passion is never a wasted journey, no matter its length.

Find My (own) Voice

I have zero recollection of what it was like learning to talk, not to mention learning the ins and the outs of the English language at such a young age. Thinking about it now, it’s pretty crazy that an 18-month-old can begin to learn sounds and words while stringing together basic sentences. Trying to learn a language now at the age of 28 seems almost impossible, so the idea that a small human can do that and not yet find the toilet is really impressive.

I remember mispronouncing a lot of words as I was learning - “Escalator” was “alphagator,” “Weed eater” was “weed heater” and “Houston” is *still* “Youston.” As a kid, I was finding my voice, and now as an adult, I feel like I’m back in the exact same place.

For the last eight years, I’ve spent a lot of my time learning other people’s voices, mostly for work. When you’re a content writer drafting verbiage for an employer, you’re taught to adopt a company voice, an image of sorts, and to stick to that voice. It’s what you do, and through that, I’ve found that it’s been really easy to lose the voice that I once worked super hard to learn (as an 18-month-old).

Reading content does funny things to you, whether it be in books, online, social media, whatever your outlet of choice is. You spend so much time looking at what others post, what others think and what others say that it makes it really hard to separate what’s yours from what’s theirs. It’s so easy to look at other brands, businesses and people for inspiration and to take rather than adapt, losing what’s your own and replacing it with their own. The situation usually plays out like this: I start trying to write a blog or a post, I can’t seem to process what I need to convey in my own words, I look at another’s content for ‘inspiration,’ I copy and paste the verbiage they’ve created onto what I’m trying to create, and then I try to cut, manipulate and change what’s theirs into something that can be mine. The result? A weird blend of multiple voices that aren’t streamlined, aren’t my own and lack the depth of thought and creativity that I’m capable of. And that’s frustrating.

I don’t think the point of social media, blogging, content creation or any sphere of writing is ever to create a culture of comparison. I think its intent is to provide a space that makes it comfortable to express oneself as oneself. A place the encourages and challenges creativity and self expression. That’s how we get better. That’s how we learn who we are and learn how to form our own thoughts ideas and options. It’s where we discover and learn our own voice.

That’s where I want to get back to. I’m ready to ditch the fear of comparison in my writing and ready to once again pursue my own thoughts, ideas, beliefs and creativity, regardless of what others, no matter how close they are to me, think - not selfishly, but in the most self challenging way possible.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Write.

What I've Learned About Goals

What does a soccer ball flying through the air at 80mph have in common with a goal? It scores, and they both terrify me.

I wish I liked goals, because you know, they get you places, but to be honest, I don’t like them much at all. They stress me out. Personally, I don’t set very many for myself, not in stone at least, and If I do set a goal, it’s a big deal. If I set a goal, it means I’m bound to something. If I’m bound to something it means I have to do the damn thing, or else I fail, and as a perfectionist, failure is worse than just about everything. Except stepping in puddles on the bathroom floor in your socks. Those are still the worst.

Goals terrify me, and for some reason, they always have.

The first goal I ever remember setting was in the fifth grade, and it was a lofty one. I was going to make 10 free throws - IN A ROW - to win our local Knights of Columbus Free Throw Competition. I remember going to the gym to practice my j’s and my free throws every day after school with my mom leading up to the big event. I’d stand at the line in my red and black T-Mac’s, brush the hair from my bowl-cut out of my eyes, take two dribbles before spinning the ball in my fingertips, and then I would stroke shot after shot up until I made ten in a row. When I missed, I would start over from the beginning and try again until I got my 10 for the day. I worked super hard to win that competition, and (humble brag) I did, but even more than that, I faced the fear I had deep down in the pit of my stomach that I was going to waste all of the hard work that I had put in over the previous few months.

Even as a fifth grader, I was aware of what it felt like to fear failing at something I cared about.

A few years ago, I set another goal. I told myself that I was going to write 100 blog posts over the span of 100 days.

When I set that goal, I didn’t have 100 topics in my back pocket that I was raring to write about. Sure, I had 15-20, but definitely not 100, which meant that more than half the time, I would sit down at my computer with no idea of what I was going to write, and I would just start typing. Eventually, words would come and slowly start to make sentences that formed the thoughts that were hiding deep in the back of my mind. It was a grueling goal to purse, but I managed to finish it. I had my busy days and late nights making sure that I wasn’t going to let myself down, and in the end, I learned a lot through the process, but I’m not sure that the thing I learned most had anything to do with writing. It had to do with goals.

Goals aren’t bad. Goals are good. I’ll fail at them, and so will you, and that’s totally okay. The most important thing is to just do them. Even after you fail. Keep doing them. Do the Whole30. Write a book. Do 5 pushups a day. Don’t kill a plant. Do the things and tell other people you’re doing them too, so they can hold you accountable and encourage you when you need it.

Don’t fear the failure. Feed the future.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Sit down and do it.

Why Don't You Chase Your Goals?

Not having goals may make life feel meaningless, but having goals and doing nothing to achieve them makes it feel damning.

It never fails, the hardest thing for me about writing has always been sitting down to write. I’ll do just about everything under the sun (i.e scroll through Instagram, taxes, iron my socks) to avoid starting the writing the process. I’ll tell myself that I want to write, but I’ll then find every excuse not too.

A few months ago, I was sitting in my room one afternoon living in the middle of one of those excuses not to write, and I fell down a rabbit hole of YouTube videos from the TV show, ‘The Office.’ It was in this hole that I found something, a kick in the pants that I needed to hear. There was a video that featured interviews from the selected cast of ‘The Office’ reading lines from their future characters. In it, the actress who plays Pam, Jenna Fischer, read this line regarding her job on the show as a receptionist:

“I don’t care if they get rid of me . . . I don’t know what I’m going to do, but whatever it is, it’s got to be a career move, not just another arbitrary job. Jim’s advice was, ‘It’s better to be at the bottom of a ladder that you want to climb rather than halfway up one that you don’t.’”

That last line, the one about being halfway up a ladder that you don’t want to be up, really got to my 26-year-old self.

It’s a weird place to be in, having goals, dreams and aspirations, but not doing anything at all to pursue them. It's like looking out over something beautiful and turning away from it like you had just looked at the back of your hand for the hundredth time. It’s a realization that’s not only sad, but even more so, self-deprecating and hostile.

I have goals; They’re aspirations that I set for myself over the years based on my gifts, skill set and passions. I want to write a book one day. I want to start my own business that funnels a communal environment into a town that lacks it. I want to invest in the lives of individuals who are younger than me who are seeking the same types of things that I sought. I want to make a difference, and to be living a life that doesn’t pursue any of the differences you want to make is living a life without purpose.

There are a lot of reason why I chose (choose?) not to pursue my goals. Pursuing goals isn’t safe, and there’s risk. There’s a great possibility of failing, and is there anything scarier or more demoralizing than failing to achieve one’s goals or having others criticize your dreams?

I think not.

For a long time, I’ve felt halfway up a ladder that I didn’t want to be up. I was climbing up a series of safe steps that were comfortable and provisionary, but while they were safe steps, they were also dangerous. They were steps that were turning my hobbies into career moves and turning my goals into unachievable dreams due to lack of pursuit and experience. I was scared of failure, and I was scared of lack of provision.

Recently, at my church in Tulsa, we went through a sermon series that covered the book of Judges in the Bible. In this book, there’s an overwhelming pattern of God’s people repeating a pattern of sin and failure over and over again that looks like this: The people serve God, they fail and fall into sin, they become enslaved, they cry out to God to save them, God raises up a Judge to deliver them, they are delivered, and then the entire cycle repeats itself over and over again. The funny thing about the book of Judges and this cycle is that it’s really easy to focus on the repeating failure of the people in the story, rather than the repeating pattern of God’s redemption.

I don’t want to take this Biblical narrative out of context, but I think there’s something to be said for God’s redemption in people’s failures - even in regards to pursuing the goals and passions that He has instilled in us. It’s one thing to fail in choosing to follow our own, self-preservation narrative in rebellion to what He has put in our hearts. It’s another thing to fail at trying to follow God and the dreams He’s given us - in that, I believe God has endless patience and endless grace, and that is a good realization to believe in.

After taking a hard look at the ladder I was standing on, I’ve stepped off of it for the time being, and I’m standing at the bottom of a new one with the same old fears of failure and lack of provision. I can’t see to the top of this ladder, and I’m not exactly sure what’s supporting it; however, I feel like this is a ladder that’s made up more of the steps that lead to goals - goals that make life feel meaningful and a lot less damning.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: It’s never too late to look at what ladder you’re on.

If I Write About Being a Millennial, Does That Make Me a Millennial?

This past Monday, Georgetown University hosted ‘Millennial Day’ at their soccer match against UCLA.

It’s 2017, and this is now a thing.

‘Millennial Day’ at #georgetownsoccer featured:

• Participation trophies for 500 fans
• A dabbing-friendly safe space
• A cable-cord-cutting station
• Stadium-wide naps during halftime
• A D.C. area Juice bar gift card raffle
• Pregame selfies with ‘Jack the Bulldog’
• Greetings with words of praise upon entry into the game
• A millennial communication section (verbal conversation prohibited - cell phone use only)
• Tickets available for just one half for those who did not want to commit to a whole game
• AND free admission if you held 3 different jobs over the last 3 years (upon showing LinkedIn profile)

Not only do I feel like this was a genius and bold marketing move to hit their target audience perfectly, but I also feel like I fit into every single one of those stereotypical categories that they were targeting… and I’m not sure how I feel about that because these marketing slogans assume at least four big things at the most basic level: Millennials are lazy, narcissistic, struggle with commitment and lack confidence. I don’t know about you (said one millennial to another), but I don’t really want to be assumed to be any of these things right off the bat.

It seems like more often than not, I hear the term ‘Millennial’ (in reference to Generation Y) in a negative connotation. Millennials are lazy, need words of affirmation constantly, can’t take losing without getting their heart broken, don’t know what they want in life, jump from job to job, only live off of their parents or off of loans, are too wrapped up in their phones and technology, etc, etc. . . the list goes on. There’s a lot to say about the generation I’m a part of, and there’s been a lot written about the generation I’m a part of- both the problems and the strengths of the generation, and this is article may just be added noise; however, this is an article about me, and about how I am (narcissism?). Maybe you can relate.

Sometimes in the workplace, I’m introduced as ‘Austin, the typical millennial,’ and as much as I’m proud of my generation and who I am, sometimes I wonder what exactly that introduction is leading me to be and what it means. Yeah, criticism can be hard for me to take, I’ve easily had three jobs in three years, I’m not sure what I want in life a lot of the time, I blog and like to travel and words of affirmation are my love language, but does that really make me like every other person in my generation? Are we all fitting into this mold that’s becoming a marketing tool to pull people into college athletic events? Or are we more than that?

Personally, I know of a lot of millennials who are doing some super amazing things. I have friends living overseas in some of the most hostile nations on the globe trying to make a difference in the world they see, I know guys running one of the most successful and thriving businesses in the city I live in, and I’ve seen friends my age start and run their own businesses like well-oiled machines with the expertise of Henry Ford. I’m not claiming to be anywhere on this level, but still, there are some pretty incredible things that people from generation Y are doing.

It seems strange to me that an entire generation (not just ‘millennials,’ but any generation for that matter) can develop a negative stigma based on they way they are. After all, each generation was brought up by a previous generation, so it seems silly to demonize a generation for being one way and not another. If anything, I’d like to believe that generations learn from the generations before them and try to do the right things they were taught and try not to make the same mistakes that were previously made. I’m not so sure that America has had its ‘Greatest Generation,’ but rather that each generation in America is brings its own unique successes and struggles. That’s what makes not only the place we live so great, but also the people have the lived here before us.

Maybe this article is millennial of me to write because it’s on a blog and because it’s about the millennial stigma, but at this point, who cares because I was born in 1991, and that’s just the way it is right now, right, wrong or just different. When I told my friend I was writing about being a millennial, I asked her if it made me a millennial. She responded with ‘L O L O L what doesn’t make us millennials?”

I agree with her. It’s who we are, and we’ll continue to write in all caps acronyms with spaces in between each letter. *Inserts ✌️ emoji*

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Don’t confuse millennial with hipster- no matter how easy it is to do sometimes. 

America’s Got Talent (And So Do You)

I like people watching, and not the kind of people watching that you do at the airport (though, that’s pretty good too).
Really, I like watching people do the things that they excel at.

I used to live in Seattle, which is a city crawling with people who aren’t afraid to display the things they excel at. You see talent everywhere. You see it in the mundane because artists turn roadblocks into murals. You see it in the people on the street asking for money because they’re usually playing some sort of instrument or reciting some sort of poem. You see it in the businesses, restaurants and stores because many of them have expanded to be the most successful companies in the world; however, despite seeing it all these places, I’ll never forget how seeing it in the place I lived completely changed my perspective on life.

While I was in Seattle, I lived in the Capitol Hill area of the city in an old monastery with about 20 other 18-25 year olds from around the country. These people are amazing. They taught me a lot, but one thing I’ve really been reflecting on lately is how much these people taught me to appreciate one another’s talents and how much joy there is in appreciating those talents. It wasn’t uncommon to walk through the door and see someone writing a poem, drawing a mural on the giant chalkboard or serving someone in a remarkable way. It was like watching the ’92 Dream Team in action, but probably better.

Not only was there writing, drawing and serving, but there was always, and I mean ALWAYS, music. There would be someone singing, someone playing guitar and then in another room, probably someone playing cello or something crazy like that. It was everywhere, and at one point there were at least 8 guitars that could be found laying around the house- one of which belonged to my good friend, Zack (Sack, as we liked to call him).

Zach is an awesome dude. We were roommates and slept about three feet from each other, but we never actually talked to one another much until about six months into living under the same roof. It was after this six months or so that I realized just how much I enjoyed the fact that Zack literally took his guitar anywhere he went around the house.
You saw Zack, you say Zack’s guitar. You saw Zack’s guitar, you heard Zack’s guitar, and what a lovely sound it was to hear.

That’s when I remember it hitting me: people are talented, and I really enjoy when people share their talents.

There’s just something transfixing about watching a person execute what they’ve worked hard at all their life. It’s more than a state of being entertained, and it doesn’t have to be on a grand, extraordinary stage; It’s about tuning into someone’s God-given creativity and soul and sharing an experience with them. It’s something deep that can connect you to a person’s core, and it’s amazing when you think about it.

People, as in the entire human race, are talented- like really, really talented, and we should enjoy that, share in that and encourage it. The world is full of crafters, business people, artisans, athletes, geniuses, storytellers and more, and we all have something like that engrained into our core. Which one are you?

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Don’t take for granted someone’s ability to do something special, in any sense of the word.

Create Creativity

The theme of creativity and what it truly means has resurfaced many times in my life, especially recently. So in this post, I’m going to tell my story as it relates to creativity, and then I’m going to help you tell yours. Here goes--

In November of 2010, my freshman year of college, I was given the opportunity to attend the World Creativity Forumin Oklahoma City. This is a world-renowned event, where creative minds from every possible walk of life come together once a year to share their stories and do their part to advance society as we know it. This event can be adequately described in one word: braingasm.

The World Creativity Forum, coupled with a recent discovery and mild obsession with oft-denounced Christian thinker, Rob Bell, made me realize something: I am so deeply compelled by these people who consider themselves “creatives” that I must be a creative person as well.

I didn’t really stop to think why I connected so well with these people. I just knew I wanted to be like them. It’s like we spoke a common language that went deeper than words. Their vibe was electrifying.

So, a year later, convinced of my creativity, I “created” an event at my university called the Oklahoma CreativityFestival (über creative, eh?). That kept me on my streak of “creativity” for a good while.

Fast forward to now, and this small-town Okie has found himself in Los Angeles, the most creative city in the world. I work for the world’s largest and arguably most innovative automotive company, Toyota. In the past few months, we have released the world’s first publically sold fuel-cell powered vehicle, we’ve announced our goal to only sell fuel cell vehicles by 2050 (basically, it’s an electric vehicle, but the electricity is provided by hydrogen which can be extracted from virtually anything that exists, and the only emission is pure drinking water), and we have invested $1billion in two new facilities where we will partner with Stanford & MIT to research artificial intelligence and autonomous transportation with the goals of eliminating fatalities caused by traffic accidents, as well as giving senior adults the opportunity to age at home with their independence and dignity intact.

Pardon me while I wipe the sweat off my brow, because my head is spinning from trying to wrap my head around thelife-changing creativity that surrounds me.

The flow of creativitysurrounding me doesn’t end at my profession though; my church, Mosaic, is situated at the end of the Walk of Fame on Hollywood Boulevard, and the mission of this church is to help people understand the critical connection between creativity and spirituality. To paraphrase the pastor, Erwin McManus:

“This is the intersection of creativity and spirituality—humans materialize the invisible… Humans create futures. No other creature has this power. The creative act is proof of the soul. We breathe; therefore we create. Jesus said we are salt of the earth and the light of the world. With those words, He illuminated the potential in us that we so often doubt.”

Why am I telling you all these details about my life? Because I want you to understand the extent of aninternal dilemma I recently faced: I call myself creative, I am drawn to creative people, I drench myself in the creativity of others… but I’m not really all that creative.

When I realized that, I felt defeated. So I began to process it, and I came to some conclusions about the truth of who I am: More and more, I realize that I am so compelled by creative people because I am actually not naturally like them. I’m really pretty boring by nature. It’s the same reason I am drawn to really liberal people: at the deepest level, I lean to the right, even if I don’t say it. That’s just who I am. But I really, really appreciate who other people are as well, and so I just want to get in their minds and live in their shoes sometimes.

Once I accepted that I’m drawn to creative people because I’m not that creative, I decided to dig even deeper into what creativity means, and when I did that, I came to an exciting conclusion: I am creative. I can create. I can take a thought and make it into something, even if it’s just words. That’s creating something, right? So maybe I’m not creative based on my former definition of creativity, which basically equated creativity to artistic expression. And while artistic expression is almost certainly one of the highest forms of creativity and beauty, that definition is also quite limited and narrow.

Here’s the lesson: creativity is not just art. Creativity is an acknowledgement within our souls that there is the potential for a better world, which can only be brought about by the unstoppable force of love. Beneath every riot chant, every protest song, every vulgar painting of war, death, depravity, and nakedness; beneath every poem of heartbreak, every euphoric dance beat, every tattoo, every Excel spreadsheet, every Powerpoint presentation, every cooked meal, every speaker’s message, every. single. output. that. we. make… is an acknowledgment--conscious or subconscious—of the existence of love. Not just brotherly love. Not just erotic love. No. Agape love. The love of God.The force of all that is good.One might argue that some create things that are meant to be evil or even just pointless. But evil and apathetic can only exist when there is love. And there is always love. There always will be love.

I’m not about to tell you that I plan on singlehandedly saving the world by turning Toyota into the PeaceCorps2.0. However, I plan on pouring my energy, life, and love into making the world better, using the auto industry as a vehicle (pun 100% intended).  I live by the Frederick Buechner quote, “The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.” The world needs clean transportation. It needs the ability to safely transport goods and services around the world. Automotive is such an enabler of good… the possibilities are endless. I didn’t hesitate to take the opportunity to work in this industry, because it’s exactly where my gladness meets the world’s needs. It’s the place I can uniquely take love to people. It’s where I can most naturally create.

And therefore, I say to you: create. Create anything. Create the most abstract, indescribable thing you can think of. Because you are powerful. Whatever it is that you create was once invisible. It was a thought, an idea. And you are making it real.

Find what makes your heart the most glad, enter that space, and create within it.

At one time, you were merely a thought, an idea. But God created you into flesh & blood. He created you. And He saw that you were/are good. You are His deepest gladness. In His infinite power, He imprinted His own likeness upon you so that you too could create.

We are not gods, but we are God’s. And we are like God, who is the definition of love. So be like God and create. Do it out of and for love. Your creativity is eternal.

 -Bryce

Bryce's Note: Creativity is essential to your existence as a human; you have the ability to turn the invisible (thought) into reality (action).

This was a guest post done by my good friend, Bryce Rowland, out of California. He's got some big things ahead. Shout out to him for taking time out of his busy schedule to contribute to Cliff Notes.  

What's your 'Christianese' for 'porn'? Just say it.

Last weekend, I attended a conference here in Adelaide called the Lifewell Conference. It was a conference that addressed some of the issues that effect our day-to-day cultural and societal experiences. With that, the conference had a speaker who addressed the issues of porn and the objectification of women, followed by a breakout session. I couldn't believe some of the graphics the woman showed us that were being displayed in our mainstream media; however, more so than that, I couldn't believe how many men seemed unaffected by what we'd just seen and heard. Out of all of the conference attendees, only five guys stayed around for that breakout session, compared to the 20 or so women who showed up (mostly concerned for their sons). I say all that to say this: Guys, where are you at, and why aren't we talking about this more?

As a 24-year-old raging, hormonic male, I would be flat out lying if I said don't struggle with lust or haven't struggled with porn. It's an issue I truly believe 99 percent of all men deal with, but only 50 percent talk about. It's been an issue ever sense Adam saw the fruit and wanted what he couldn't have. 

For some, porn is something to be proud of for watching. For Christians, it's a shameful thing that we're proud to watch when no one's looking. Let's face it, what is there stopping us? It's easy enough to pull it up on our smartphones or computers, erase it from our search history and pretend it never happened. There's no consequence, and in reality, it's rare that anyone could ever find out. Plus, what's more manly than sitting in front of a computer screen with your pants around your ankles? 

It's true, porn is a problem; However, as much as porn is the problem, it's not the only problem. It's also fear, shame and cowardliness. We are cowards while we feel, for a short time, empowered. So many times in Christian circles, we're scared to even say the word 'porn.' It's a word we bounce around and replace with "I stumbled," "secret sin" or the infamous "unspoken." As is said in Harry Potter, "Fear of the name only increases fear for the thing itself."  We don't address the real issues because we won't address the real word for fear of shame and the 'what will others think' syndrome. If we're scared to say the word porn, we're going to be terrified to admit we're actually watching it. 

Just as we hide behind our screens, we hide behind our shame. We're scared to tell even those closest to us, whether it's our best friends, mentors or our brothers and sisters in Christ. We pray for forgiveness, but where then after is the repentance? If and when we do confess to each other, we often receive an, "It's okay. There's grace for that" comeback, without any real challenge or consequence. Here's the deal, though. I don't believe there's just grace to be had. I believe there's more than that - there's power.

Just as God has given us grace upon grace, He has also, and more so, given us the power of His Spirit to overcome the bondage many of us have struggled with in regards to lust, porn and adultery. We have not been given a Spirit of shame, but of boldness, and we have not been given a Spirit of slavery, but of freedom and new life. 

This week, let us begin to be bold and free. Let us simply confess and say the word 'porn' if we need to. The secret to battling porn is talking about it, openly, not awkwardly. Find accountability that actually holds you accountable. Tell someone, anyone, and just talk about it because I promise, you're not alone. If you can't think of anyone to talk to, talk to me. I'd love to trade struggle stories and challenge one another. Let us not be cowards. I promise you this, friends: We will not experience freedom until we experience fearlessness.

-Cliff

Cliff's Note: We will not experience freedom until we experience fearlessness

What Are You Afraid Of?

The first memory that I have of being scared is from a reoccurring nightmare that I had when I was a kid. In this nightmare, ‘Little Caesar’ from the Little Caesar’s commercials would chase me around a sidewalk above a deep, dark pit screaming “Pizza! Pizza!” at me until I fell off the sidewalk and into the pit. Looking back on it now, I completely understand why this was so scary; you’d be scared too if a miniature, zombie-Caesar was chasing you around a pit with a spear full of nasty, $5 pizza screaming at you to eat it. That’s terrifying and not to mention a terrible marketing strategy if you ask me.

Every time I woke up from this dream, I’d be breathing heavy, covered in sweat and completely terrified. However, I’m not totally sure of what I was terrified of. I don’t’ know if I was really scared of zombie-Caesar or if I was scared of what was at the bottom of the pit. I never really knew what was at the bottom of the pit because I never got there. There’s just something about ‘falling dreams’ that don’t allow you to ever actually hit the ground. I never knew what was there, but I was still scared; I was scared of the unknown.

Deep down, I wonder if that’s what really drives our fears – the unknown. Ever since I’ve been old enough to have fears and know what my fears were, I’ve been scared of three things: death, being left alone at night in the middle of the woods or the ocean and Cold Case Files reruns. Those three are my bugga-boos, and just thinking about them gives me goose bumps every time. Death used to be a lot scarier than it is now. I used to be scared of it because I didn’t know where I was going to go when I died (Praise the Lord now I do). What’s scary about death now is that I don’t know where all my friends and family are going to go when they die. Being left alone at night in the middle of the woods or the ocean is still scary to me because I have ZERO idea what’s out there. For all I know, there could be a man-eating ghost deer or a shark the size of Texas swimming around. I don’t think I need to have an explanation for the Cold Case Files reruns; they’re serial murder cases that have gone cold because they can’t find the murderer! He may be right behind you for all you know. The point behind all of these fears is that there is an ‘unknown’ driving them all.

With that, I ask the question: Who do we fear more? Satan, who we know has the ultimate defeat, or Jesus, Who we know has the ultimate victory?

I think the easy answer is to say that we shouldn’t fear at all because how can one fear when we know the outcome; however, I think there’s more to it than that, and I think a healthy dose of fear is good because without fear, what reverence do we have?

I often seem to fear satan first. Culture has made a mockery out of my King, and it has turned satan and demons into movie stars that we should fear because they may be lurking under our beds and possessing our children. They have taken Jesus, Ruler of the Universe, and turned Him into a teddy bear full of love that sits on a cloud. I’m sorry, but that portrayal of Jesus isn’t much to be feared. What about the Jesus we read about in Revelation Who rides on a white horse ready to judge and make war with eyes like flames of fire, a sword coming from His mouth and His robe dipped in blood? That’s something to fear.

Romans 11:34 says “For who has known the mind of the Lord. . .?” No one. No one has every known or could possibly know the mind of the Lord and because of that there should be fear, not because He is an unjust dictator in the clouds ready to smite us, but because His ways are Higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. He is personal, and we are to be in relationship with Him, but the mystery of His ways and thoughts should evoke a reverent fear of His all-powerfulness.

The Bible uses the word “fear” in reference to God something like 300 times, but it doesn’t say anywhere that we are to fear satan or his demons. We know what satan really is. Satan is a loser. He’s already lost the battle, and he’s only here to spread lies that he is something to fear when he’s not. There is no unknowing to satan. We know his final destiny, and we know what he is because God has exposed to us everything about him and how and why he works.

I write this because I don’t want myself or my Brothers and Sisters to ever fear the enemy. Whether it’s a group of ‘satanists’ passing out demonic coloring books to children in elementary schools or another group planting a satanic statue in the state capitol building, we shouldn’t fret. My home has recently been experiencing both of these obstacles, and it sucks to see it happen to the place I grew up in; however, it’s important to realize that in the end, Jesus wins. Even when a group says, “The coloring books give children the opportunity to see that devil worship is not what everyone tells them it is,” we shouldn’t live in fear because as scary as that statement sounds, it holds no weight compared to this promise:

“Then I saw an angel coming down from heaven, holding the key of the abyss and a great chain in his hand. And he laid hold of the dragon, the serpent of old, who is the devil and Satan, and bound him for a thousand years; and he threw him into the abyss, and shut it and sealed it over him, so that he would not deceive the nations any longer . . .” – Revelation 20:1-3

Now that’s a dark pit to be scared of.

Let’s love the people we’re ‘scared’ of and fight this war with courage. We’re fighting from victory, not for victory, folks. Don’t be afraid as we fight this battle together as One Church, but only fear the unknown of which is the mystery of our Lord.
These are just some thoughts that right now I believe to be true in my Simple-Minded, Inexperienced Lifestyle Expert life. What are you afraid of?

-Cliff

Why Life Shouldn't Be a Social Media Post

The other day on my walk to church, I passed by some of the most beautiful blue flowers I’d ever seen. They were so perfect; I didn’t even have to put a filter on the picture I took of them for social media purposes.

As I passed by these flowers and stopped to take a photo to share with the whole world (especially my girlfriend) via social media, I was stoked. I was so excited to deliver this newly discovered beauty to my small social media galaxy until, all of a sudden, the thoughts rolled in. The thoughts and fears of what others might think about this post clouded my mind as I stood there awkwardly in front of this person’s home debating whether or not to share their small garden secret with the world.

My thoughts:
Men aren’t supposed to post pictures of flowers; flowers are girly.
No one is going to like this. It’s not something I normally post.
It’s just a picture of flowers. Who really cares?
Men aren’t supposed to post pictures of flowers.
You’re a man. Men don’t post flower pictures.
Flowers. Man. No.

I spent a solid two minutes standing on the sidewalk in front of this person’s house having an argument with myself about whether or not the picture was worth posting. I was consumed with whether or not this post on social media would be something people responded to positively because, just like anything I post, I would constantly check to see how many likes, comments or reTweets I got, and depending on the feedback, it would either make me happy or sad. If people responded well, I’d smile and pat myself on the back. If it were bad, I’d feel let down and probably delete it because I wouldn’t want anything that made me look unpopular left on my profile.

I always seem to shape not only my social media, but also my life, around what will get me the most responses and most gratification. The more ‘likes’ I get from people, the better I feel. If my friends liked seeing pictures of me with cats, I’d start kidnapping cats from around the neighborhood so I could take photos with them. If I knew my friends didn’t like dogs, I probably wouldn’t post pictures of dogs (even though I really love dogs and really hate cats). In short, I don’t post things because I want to or should; I post things to impress others.

This isn’t healthy, not just on social media, but for life in general. If life were about living for the approval of others, then how we treat others, our free time and ourselves would begin to be ruled by what everyone else thinks. If each moment in life turned into its own social media post and our decisions were based on the number of real-life ‘likes’ we got, then there would be a lot of important people in our lives hitting the unfollow button.

Seeking approval from others has always been a big problem of mine. That’s why I stand in front of stranger’s houses debating whether or not to post pictures of their flowers. Therefore, I want to encourage you with this:

Post the picture.

Don’t be an actor trying to perform for your friends because that’s acting and not reality. Be yourself and play the role God has picked out for you in this great story called life. Escape the worry of what others think and relax in the promise that it doesn’t matter what they think. Everyone is weird, and you’re no different. Take pictures of flowers, post them and if someone says something, tell them to stop and smell the roses.

-Cliff