What does a soccer ball flying through the air at 80mph have in common with a goal? It scores, and they both terrify me.
I wish I liked goals, because you know, they get you places, but to be honest, I don’t like them much at all. They stress me out. Personally, I don’t set very many for myself, not in stone at least, and If I do set a goal, it’s a big deal. If I set a goal, it means I’m bound to something. If I’m bound to something it means I have to do the damn thing, or else I fail, and as a perfectionist, failure is worse than just about everything. Except stepping in puddles on the bathroom floor in your socks. Those are still the worst.
Goals terrify me, and for some reason, they always have.
The first goal I ever remember setting was in the fifth grade, and it was a lofty one. I was going to make 10 free throws - IN A ROW - to win our local Knights of Columbus Free Throw Competition. I remember going to the gym to practice my j’s and my free throws every day after school with my mom leading up to the big event. I’d stand at the line in my red and black T-Mac’s, brush the hair from my bowl-cut out of my eyes, take two dribbles before spinning the ball in my fingertips, and then I would stroke shot after shot up until I made ten in a row. When I missed, I would start over from the beginning and try again until I got my 10 for the day. I worked super hard to win that competition, and (humble brag) I did, but even more than that, I faced the fear I had deep down in the pit of my stomach that I was going to waste all of the hard work that I had put in over the previous few months.
Even as a fifth grader, I was aware of what it felt like to fear failing at something I cared about.
A few years ago, I set another goal. I told myself that I was going to write 100 blog posts over the span of 100 days.
When I set that goal, I didn’t have 100 topics in my back pocket that I was raring to write about. Sure, I had 15-20, but definitely not 100, which meant that more than half the time, I would sit down at my computer with no idea of what I was going to write, and I would just start typing. Eventually, words would come and slowly start to make sentences that formed the thoughts that were hiding deep in the back of my mind. It was a grueling goal to purse, but I managed to finish it. I had my busy days and late nights making sure that I wasn’t going to let myself down, and in the end, I learned a lot through the process, but I’m not sure that the thing I learned most had anything to do with writing. It had to do with goals.
Goals aren’t bad. Goals are good. I’ll fail at them, and so will you, and that’s totally okay. The most important thing is to just do them. Even after you fail. Keep doing them. Do the Whole30. Write a book. Do 5 pushups a day. Don’t kill a plant. Do the things and tell other people you’re doing them too, so they can hold you accountable and encourage you when you need it.
Don’t fear the failure. Feed the future.
-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Sit down and do it.