Transforming Reality

Not long ago, I was a recent college graduate without ties to much of anything. I could go where I wanted to go, work where I wanted to work and ultimately, let my narrative feel out of my control and in the control of my Creator. It was a season, a special season.

Now, I have been out of college for nearly a decade, and I have several ties . I have roots, a steady job and a wife I love. My narrative has changed, and it has turned into something I feel like I have to control. It’s a new season, a special one.

But I have landed on a key difference in where I’m at spiritually. What once felt like God’s control now often feels like my control.

The other day, I was listening to a podcast on Faith and Trust. It was an episode relating to much of how i’ve been feeling, about how we should live out our narrative in a way that requires Faith to see the Spirit of God meet us where we are uncertain, ultimately to provide for us in ways that are beyond ourselves.

The host of the show shared that, ”Faith is the breaking of our Spiritual paths,” and he also shared the ancient story of a man named Abraham from the first book of the Bible, Genesis.

Part of Abraham’s story is God asking him to climb a mountain to sacrifice his own son. It’s a story that’s often followed with the reasonable question of, “Why would a loving God ask a man to kill his own son?”
But as the story goes, Abraham does climb the mountain, and before he can make his ultimate sacrifice, God shows up and provides a ram in place of Abraham’s son.

There are a lot of details and questions to ask and address in that narrative, but what the host of the podcast keyed in on was Faith and where we are led by it.

There are ways we learn to follow God and have Faith. Good things, comfortable things and things that make our spiritual routine what it is. The things we are used to. But Faith is the one thing that pulls us out of those comfortable things and out of our routines, and I believe the reason the Faith pulls us out of those things is so we can have rebirth.

Abraham seeing God show up with a ram on the mountain is the type of spiritual rebirth Jesus talks about in the Christian Gospel narrative. The rebirth in the Spirit and Faith in the Spirit.

When Jesus sends out His followers to do share His Good News, Jesus says, “Don’t worry about what you’re going to say, the Spirit will provide.” Just as what Abraham experienced on the mountain, what we need is provided.

God will provide the sacrifice when you get there.
God will provide the words when you get there.
We don’t have to have it all figured it out.

And all this led me back to how important it is to not only have Faith, but to also tell your story and to seek out a story to tell that requires Faith so we can experience more of the Spirit of God showing up when we need it. That we should be able to have the freedom to do what Abraham did and go out on to a mountain with a belief, and have that belief fulfilled.

Abraham carried the belief of a good God, but it wasn’t until he got to the mountain that he saw that belief lived out. And when we do that ourselves and see Faith become Reality, then Reality changes.

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Never grow too old to seek out living a story that requires the Thing beyond oneself.

Thoughts on Empathy, Story and the Death of an Anonymous Child

This past weekend in Oklahoma was a cold one. Temperatures were well under freezing, the sun was hidden behind the clouds, and snow flurries were fluttering down from the icy grey side outside the windows of our home.

For some reason, it’s weekends like this when watching Harry Potter seems like the only thing to do. So, that’s what my wife, Sarah, and I did. We made a frozen pizza, poured some wine and turned on the tube to watch the most-recent Harry Potter spin-off, “Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.”

Sarah and I weren’t half-way into the movie when the first death occurred on-screen. The murder wasn’t of a significant character; however, it was of a child. A baby.

In the film, you didn’t actually see the crime committed, but you knew what happened. The movie’s villain had just taken over a family’s home that he would be using as his ‘headquarters,’ and after he murdered the adults, he stumbled upon a nursery with a baby playin in its crib. The scene shows the villain dismissing his followers to the other room, and as they close the door, the villain raises his weapon to commit the crime. The entire scene is fleeting, running under 30 seconds, and then, it’s off to to the next scene, as if the child and its’ family had never existed.

We continued to watch the film, and about an hour after the scene of the anonymous family being killed, my mind went back to them.

I started to think about how I could watch something so awful and not feel anything. Sure, there was an initial shock, but overall, I felt no which way about the family that was killed. It was a short scene in a long movie with no-name characters. But life was still lost, and it had not affected me.

I began to contrast this same situation with another character, another baby, in the World of Harry Potter - Harry Potter himself. We are introduced to him a 10-year-old kid, and we get certain glimpses at his life as a baby along the journey of his story. We see how he was loved, how his parents sacrificed their lives for them and how he ultimately, avenged their deaths and saved the ‘wizarding world,’ and i’m quite certain that if he had died somewhere along the way, I would have felt something. I would have been affected.

Harry Potter had a name, and I knew it. He also had a story, and I knew that too.
The child in ‘Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them’ had no name, and there was no way to know it. The child, while young, also had a story, and I didn’t know that either.

Knowing one another’s stories is important. It’s so important that, in my opinion, without knowing others’ stories, would would lack the ability to empathize.

I have spent countless hours with Harry Potter. Reading the books and watching the movies has occupied a portion of almost every ‘snow day’ i’ve had since I was an 11-year-old boy sitting by the fire at my parents house. I took time to know him.

On the other hand, I had no time to get to know the anonymous child, mostly because the director didn’t allow for it, but the lesson rings true: To know someone, to spend time with them and to hear their story changes our entire paradigm when faced with loss, gain, adversity, celebration, misunderstanding and triumph.

When we know another’s story, it changes our life, and it changes our ability to interact with theirs.

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Knowing story leads to empathy.

Hating the Sound of Your Own Voice

My dad and I used to go to college football games together when I was growing up. We would sit up in the stands about halfway up at Oklahoma State University’s Lewis Field, and we were always surrounded by the same people every year. They all become somewhat of our fall “family.” From season to season, we’d always pick up where we left off the previous season’s conversation on work, kids and life.

There was a guy who always sat behind us, and he was louder than every else in the stands. He talked a lot too, and my dad would always say, “That guy must like the sound of his own voice.”

And I never really knew what my dad meant at the time because I was six years old, but now I do, and I can’t tell you how much I’m the opposite - I hate the sound of my own voice.

I was just promoted to the Youth Director position at my church, which has led to the development of me hating my own voice. Until now, I’ve never been in a position where I have to continually lead and drive a conversation. Public speaking is new to me.

I don’t necessarily hate my own voice because of the way it sounds; I mostly hate the sound of my own voice because of the pressure that comes with listening to it. When one is speaking and speaking publicly, most all eyes & ears are on you (and if they aren’t, it’s a bit discouraging). But being a focal point, leading a conversation, teaching & instructing and drawing attention to myself is new to me and something I’ve never been comfortable with.

So now i’m wondering, does it ever get easier?

Will I always lack confidence before I speak?
Will i always cut my sentence short because I think others are board?
Will I will get self conscience when I see someone looking at their phone?

Or will I become okay with silence?
Will I find confidence in who I am and the story God has given me to tell?
Will I embrace the awkwardness of the human experience and climb out of my shell?

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: While I don’t want to be the guy who likes the sound of his own voice, I do want to be the guy who is confident in who God has created him to be.

A Story of Rescue

One of the first memories I can recall from my childhood comes from a summer day at Vacation Bible School held at the church I attended growing up. 

I was probably in first grade. 

I was sitting in a circle full of other kids my age, and our Bible School teacher was taking us through the “Christian,” ABCs. 

Admit (you are a sinner)

Believe (Believe that Jesus is God’s Son, that he was born, died and rose again)

Confess (that Jesus is Lord of your Life)

After she finished teaching us the song and what it meant, she asked if there was any one of us who wanted to say their own ABCs and be saved.

Everyone around me raised their hands, so I did too.

We all closed our eyes, said a prayer asking Jesus to come make a home in our hearts, using the ABC method of course, and then we opened our eyes and went to the gym play kick ball, drink milk and eat cookies.

After Bible School was over that day, my mom came to pick up with in her blue Ford Explorer, along with all the other moms. She asked me how my day was, and after I told her it was fine but that I had spilt my milk, she asked me if I had made any “Special Decisions” that day.

Of course, the Bible School teacher must have already told her about my raised hand and closed eyes at the pick-up line, and so I told her what I could remember of closing my eyes and praying through my ABCs.

To my mom, this was the best news of her life. A day I’m sure she had been praying for. Me, on the other hand, it was just another day to be upset over spilled milk. I had no idea what I had done, what I was doing or what I had prayed.

I grew up in the church, and I went almost every Sunday and Wednesday night from the time I was in diapers to now. I was around it all the time, and when you’re around something all of the time, it creates things inside you. Both good things and bad things, and in me, the church certainly created good things,

but it also created bad things, and one of those things was cynicism. 

Growing up in the church for me looked a lot different than it did for my peers. Church was always a family event for everyone around me. Kids would ride to church with their parents, sit with their families in the blue pews and then all go to lunch together after the service.

For me, church was lonely, at best. 
My parents went to separate churches.

They had their reasons. My mom played in a worship band with another church, and my dad took me to church so I could be with my friends, but it was never a family event, from childhood into middle school and high school, I felt mostly on my own.

When I entered the youth group - cue “youth Sunday” transition here - it was huge! The ministry was thriving, and the youth minister at the time, who was there from my 6th grade year to the end of my 9th grade year, took a lot of time and effort to grow our youth group. He poured into teaching, music and the experience of it all, and he even created a “youth council” of promising kids who were smart and involved to be the leaders of the group.

I was not in the youth council, and It was about the time I hit 8th grade that I felt like I didn’t fit the mold of a “youth leader.” Or that’s what I thought at the time, but really I think it’s just hard to pour into each and every kid on a personal level when there’s 150 of us running around. But still, that lonely, isolated feeling continued and fostered.

So that’s where my cynicism grew. Lots of questions left unanswered, bitterness and jealous of what I saw around me and didn’t have, but still yet, the church remained constant. It was a staple of life, and it was good.

When the first youth pastor our group had moved on, our youth group shrunk.. kind of like televisions did from the 90s to now. It took the church a while to find someone to fill in, but eventually they made a hire and things picked back up.

It was in that season, between my sophomore and senior year of college that not only did life start coming at me fast, but so did the intentionality of our new youth pastor, John. 

This was the season of life when not only was my cynicism was growing, but so was the sins of lust, lying and living for myself. 

And as my questions and struggles with sin grew, so did the opportunities for me to ask questions and understand grace with the help and listening ear of John.

John met me every Friday morning for breakfast. He entertained all my questions and doubts and helped me understand it was okay to have those questions and that someone else actually cared about me. And that’s a big reason why I am doing what I’m doing today. Having an adult, that wasn’t my parents, care about me as a smelly teenager, was vital. And if I can do that for another kid on any level, then I think that’s important. 

My biggest questions at the time were, what was that prayer I prayed that I barely remember from VBS? Did that count for anything? Does that count for everyone who closed their eyes that day? Is that salvation? And, we worked through those questions, and the more we did, the more I began to experience God’s grace through Christ for my mistakes, and that was salvation more than I had ever known. 

Growing up in the Church can be ugly, but isn’t It beautiful? 

The Church and leadership I grew up with had it’s brokenness, as we all do, but it also taught me much. It showed me who I was, Who I needed, and who that made me to be, in Christ.

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: My story of rescue isn’t your story of rescue, but I hope you find it and tell it one day.

Time for Rest

My dad is a farmer. When I was growing up, he would teach me about farming using stories from the Bible. He would teach small lessons and big lessons, both practical and spiritual.

I remember one Saturday, he explained to me how fields need rest, just as people need rest. That whenever we plant a certain crop in a field one year, we can’t plant the same crop the next year. And every seven years or so, we didn’t plant anything at all. We let it rest.

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“For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven…
a time to plant and a time to harvest.
a time to be silent and a time to speak.

There is also a time to rest and a time to work.

Right now, it is time to rest, to rest from this platform.

I have spent the last six months cultivating this platform into a consistent place to create, post and process. As 2021 comes to a close, I feel it’s time to give the platform rest. To come back to it in the new year and see if I want to change it or keep rolling with the consistency that I have built.

I am slowly but surely finding my way to becoming a writer. To showing up day-in and day-out, punching the clock and hitting the keyboard, even when I don’t want to. And now, as the holidays arrive, the days get shorter and the nights longer, it is a time to rest here. While there may be an occasional post or thought, the next couple of months will be spent strategizing both at work and on the keyboard with what’s to come in 2022.

So, cheers to 2021, to consistency and to us all taking the small steps toward who we want to be.
Thank you for reading Cliff Notes;

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Rest is just part of the process.

Feeling Full

Last night, I had a lot to do after work. I needed to rake leaves, clean the house, stack fire wood and go to the grocery store. We’re preparing to host a party, and there are things that need to be done.

In all of the chaos, I had to find time to eat dinner. I opened up our freezer to pull out a frozen pizza we had, an easy, quick option that cooks while I continue to clean. As I was eating my fourth slice of pizza, a new thought I had never had before popped into my head: What all do I put in my body?

In that moment, I didn’t feel great about myself. One rarely does after they eat half a pizza, but this time, something stuck out to me. How much am I killing myself, taking years off of my life, for not eating like I should.

I go to the gym regularly, but I still eat like I’m in high school. Fast food doesn’t bother me, and neither does shoving my mouth full of sodium-packed frozen foods. Sure, a few of these options here and there aren’t bad at all, but the rate i’ve been going lately can’t be sustainable for good health.

It’s almost the New Year, and as cliche as it is, I think I’m going to make a resolution to eat healthier for the first time in my life, focusing on feeding my body the things it needs to be healthy and fueled, rather than eating to simply feel full.

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: I’m not in high school anymore, so I should stop eating like it. More greens and less browns.

What Unity Lacks

There’s a quote I came across from American writer, David Dark after the US Capitol attack in 2021.

“Unity without reckoning is marketing.”

I haven’t read much of his work, but this statement shook me to my core for a couple of reasons. One, because it contains the word ‘reckoning,’ which as far as words go, is as strong as the final dregs of your grandpa’s cocktail. But it shakes me even more so because I can put myself at the bookends of this quote. I am both:

1. a person passionate about unity, and

2. a person with a career in marketing

And so while I often speak of unity, I’m terrified that all that will come out of my life is the marketing of unity’s goodness and potential, without any real action toward it. Because action and reckoning are really what unity need.

True unity calls humans, as God’s creation, toward true confession and recognition of mistakes and toward reconciliation. There must be an agreement that mistakes have been made, that there should be accountability held for those mistakes, and that at the end of the road, grace and forgiveness await.

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Reckoning does not have to be a part of cancel culture. It can instead be full of rehabilitation and life.

Screentime & Stress

In 2016, I got my first “real” job, a job that would require me to sit at a computer all day. I would write content, create graphics, edit photos and post on the companies social media accounts for 8-10 hours each day.

I got a lot of headaches at that job.

As I switched up jobs and continued to sit at more computers, the headaches continued, and I began to wonder, “Are these screen headaches or stress headaches?”

Both can be fixed. There are blue light glasses available, and stress can be managed, but one of those fixes is easier said than done.

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The other day, I saw a job posting from the University of Kentucky basketball program. They were hiring a digital media manager role, much like the role i’m in now and much like the role I was in when I got my first “real” job. The major difference was, the University of Kentucky was only going to pay $20,000/year for the job to be done, which wasn’t much different than I made at my first job.

An unfair and abusive use of an employee.

///

I think the world sees digital media marketers as less-than. They see social media and think, “Anyone can do that, why should I pay much for it.” When those of us in the industry know that’s note the reality. Digital media and social media are stressful. It requires a person to always be connected, always be on call and always be the funnel of the dissemination of all information and storytelling. You’re at the mercy of everyone around you, and most times, no one understand the work involved.

This creates a lot of screen time. This creates stress. This creates headaches.

At the end of the day, if you’re in digital marketing, take care of yourself. Take breaks, know your limits and know where you can push back and say, “This is too much.” Because in a world that’s full of content being put out 24/7, sometimes it’s okay to say, “This is too much.”

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Headaches can be avoided if I look out for myself.

Something About Fires

There’s something special about fires.
There’s something special about they way they’re built up,
and there’s something special about the way relationships are built around them.

There’s something special about fires.
There’s something special about the way they melt away the cold,
and the way they melt away fear.

There’s something special about fires.
There’s something special about the way they stoke warm,
and the way they stoke conversation.

There’s something special about fires.
There’s something special about the way the coals light up,
and the way they make our dreams light up.

There’s something special about fires.
There’s something special about the way they make whiskey go down smoother,
and the way they make truth easier to swallow.

There’s something special about fires.
There’s something special about the way they turn what was solid to ash,
and the way they too turn our bodies to ash.

There’s something special about fires.
There’s something about how they burn,
and the way that we burn with them.

There’s something special about fires.

-Cliff
Cliff’s Note: Sit by a fire and watch relationships burn strong.

Measured Time

Time is strange.

What it does to us and to the world around us.

Some things age. Some things stay the same.

The cycles it brings and the linear nature of history, both at the same time.

I was thinking about time a lot this weekend. I saw family friends admitted to the hospital, and I also saw friends I used to go to school with become new teachers at the school we used to go to.

The circle of life.

A trip around the sun.

A new season.

Time goes by many things, and it’s measured by just as many. Suns, moons, days, months, years, all documented on clocks, calendars and the lines on our faces.

And as we measure it, we all wonder the same thing. Where does it go?

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: “Time keeps on slippin’ away.” - Steve Miller

Finding What You Love

Yesterday morning, I was listening to a podcast about turning one’s passion into a career and what it takes to make money off doing something you love. In the 28 minute episode, the host and guest of the show dive into why taking chances, saying yes and being optimistic help make businesses succeed, especially if you’re trying to start your own business. Makes sense.

Another reason for a successful business that the podcast dives into is being able to lose sleep over doing what you love. This was the idea that got me thinking about the things I would lose sleep over. After all, I do love sleep.

When I look at my life as it is now, I lose sleep over working out and writing, but really that’s about it. And most of that is working out. The writing has been a bit of a drag lately. And in all honesty, there aren’t a lot of things that I would work so hard at that I would sacrifice sleep for. I can’t seem to find what that ‘passion’ is. I don’t get up excited to work out or write. Currently, those are just things I feel obligated to do. I’m having trouble finding my passion. Finding what I love to do.

Is this common?
Is it seasonal?
Do you feel that way?
Could you let me know if you do, so I don’t feel so alone?

Looking at the world around me, it seems like everyone else has a passion. People love their work, love where they volunteer and love passions or hobbies that they lose sleep over. Lately, I haven’t felt that, and i’m searching for that feeling again. Hopefully it shows up soon, otherwise, there may not be many words left to write because passion often fuels the words.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Find something worth losing sleep over.

Emotional Healing Vs. Physical Healing

Earlier this week, I was prepping dinner and slicing up onions to add to a dish. About halfway through the onion, I sliced the very tip part of my thumb off with the knife I was using.

It felt terrible.
Blood went everywhere.
The onion was ruined.

It’s been nearly 4 days since the cut happened, and it has just now healed enough to where it doesn’t bleed whenever I bump the wound.

Time heals.
As does the human body.

I was talking about this healing process with a friend at lunch yesterday. We were talking about how incredible it is that the body can do what it can do, regrowing skin, mending itself. Targeted right toward the wound.

As we were talking, I couldn’t help but wonder about emotional wounds and emotional healing. Does it work the same? Can our minds and our souls callous and regrow as we become wounded by life? And even if they can, is that healthy?

Part of me thinks no. And a larger part of me thinks emotional healing us much slower than physical healing. As skin regrows in a matter of days, emotional scars last years, if not lifetimes. And as skin regrows, scars and reveals damage, so do emotions.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Mental health healing can be harder than physical health healing.

Taking Ourselves Too Seriously

My wife, Sarah, works for a national corporation. The structure of her company is ‘corporate,’ and so are many aspects of the culture she’s involved in.

The other day, we were working together from a local brewery to wind down a long day, and she showed me an email she had sent to her to team as she explained how a new product launch had gone for them. The email was an internal piece that probably went to 20 people or so, and the first thing I noticed about the email was that it lead off with a relevant .gif at the top of the thread, followed by light-hearted, exciting text. It was a small reel of the GEICO Hump Day Camel (no, Sarah doesn’t work for GEICO). An added, fun touch to an exciting announcement within the company.

I took note of that .gif and admired Sarah for the fun she brought to her work. Even in the craziness and stress of a product launch, she brought an element of fun, excitement and creativity to the table that was no doubt a breath of fresh air to the rest of her team.

The .gif usage stood out to me more than it normally would because as of late, I’ve felt like sometimes I take myself too seriously. At work and in life. I’ve thought too much about sounding professional and perfect within email threads, and I’ve lost touch with bringing creativity and fun to situations when I have the chance to. Part of that is due to the work culture i’m in myself, as it’s an extremely buttoned-up environment, and because it’s that way, I believe it offers even more chances to be creative in bringing fun into the work place.

In work, in family, in faith and in life, fun is important and team comradery is vital. Taking ourselves too seriously can get in the way of both.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: When in doubt, send a .gif.

Jobs, Passion and Hobbies

Job. Passion. Hobby.

Three different things that can bend and bleed into one another throughout life, sometimes for the best, and sometimes for the worst.

Jobs.
Some of us work for the weekend. Some of us live to work.

Passions.
We feel deeply toward a cause or a subject and can’t get enough of it.

Hobbies.
Leisure. Fun. A work in progress. Enjoyment and establishing goals and growth.

Lately, I’ve been trying to figure out what writing is for me. Sure, I enjoy it. It’s something that I’m good at, and I have personal goals surrounding it. It also bleeds into my job most days. I spend extra time working on the craft, but I also feel spent after long sessions of it.

It bends and it bleeds.

I’m not sure what I want writing to be either. If it was a full-time job, would it still contain joy? If it were only a hobby, would I have any passion behind it? I could certainly use more time to work on it, but I also am glad it doesn’t control my life, and for now, that’s okay. Maybe writing will be every-evolving, just like myself. It will change with life’s seasons, some seasons being better than others. And there’s peace in the realization.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Jobs, passions and hobbies can’t always be dictated by oneself, but rather by life’s season.

Off One's Game

Do you ever analyze the life of a celebrity and realize it’s just not their week? Maybe its an athlete who’s off their game or an actor making headlines for all of the wrong reasons over and over again. Truth be told, that’s how my week has felt. It’s felt off.

It’s Friday and ever since Monday, I’ve only gone to the gym once, written twice and read here and there. I haven’t made any progress on a book I’m working on, and work has been a blur of events, leaving little time to actually get real things accomplished.

But a lot of that ‘productivity’ that I’m missing is personally selfish.
My book. My work. My workouts.

On the other side of things, it’s been productive.

My wife’s birthday was this week, so we spent a lot of time celebrating her, which has been tremendous. The events at work have been put on for others to enjoy. I had to have some minor foot surgery, taking me out of the gym for a little while. All great things that need to be done, but all things that take away selfish motives.

This week has bee a good reminder that the world doesn’t revolve around me. It has reminded me how important certain rituals are in feeling ‘put together’ and productive. It has also been a reminder that change is good.

So, when you feel off your game, is it because you are out of ritual, pouring out to others or maybe something else?

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Feeling off isn’t always off.

Affirmation & Authority

“I never knew what I wanted to do when it was time for me to go to college.”

That could be the cry of the millennial generation, but it could also be true. It was for me.

Growing up, I rarely knew what I was good at. I felt affirmation through sport, but that was just about it. Rarely did I ever hear anything about excelling in a particular subject in school, and without that affirmation, i felt a lack of ability to capitalize on any certain subject or career field when it came time to move on to university.

I lacked authority, affirmation and acknowledgment.

This morning, I was reading about the time Jesus first called his 12 disciples together to send them out. It caught my attention that before giving them instructions on what to do, He gave them authority to do it. He instilled them with authority and power in who they were and who they were created to be. That felt important, and it felt like something I have lacked in my own life from teachers in the past.

Maybe you feel the same way, maybe you don’t, but whatever side of authority you sit in, use it to encourage, affirm and equip someone today. It could change a life and a future.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Share authority. Give Purpose.

Road Trips with Dad

As a kid, my dad used to take me to work with him in the summers. He didn’t have a normal, office job. My dad worked for an insurance company, and he traveled all over the state inspecting the buildings his company insured, making sure they were all up to ‘code.’ In my eyes, it was one of the coolest jobs a dad could have because it seemed like he was pretty much his own boss.

I looked forward to the trips we took every year. We would leave early in the morning, make 10-15 stops throughout the day (one of which would always be for a hamburger at lunch), and we would always stay in a hotel afterward, capping off the day with a swim in the pool, seeing a movie or going to a park to wind down the evening. They were some of the best summer memories.

Over the years, my dad spent as much time on the road as a semi-truck driver, maybe more, and I’m grateful I got to spend at least a few of those millions of miles with him. My dad taught me to love the long drives and the roads that take us places. He taught me patience and simplicity, some of life’s greatest lessons.

There’s beauty in the irony of this hot summer day, now fully grown. I am sitting in my own office, watching the traffic go by on the road he used to take to work every Monday morning, imagining myself sitting right next to him again, listening to the radio, watching the cars go by and casually listening to the stories he had to tell.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Don’t write-off road trips; they’re often full of more memories than miles.

Helping Others

Emmanuel Sosanya is the owner of the local gym that I go to in Oklahoma City. He’s being in the fitness industry for several years, and he’s also been a public school teacher and coach. He’s great at what he does, too. He brings top-notch energy, encouragement with challenges and cares enough to know all of his clients’ names and a little bit about whats’s going on in each of their personal lives. As a father of three, along with his wife, he’s one he gives more than he takes, and each moment of giving is with a contagious joy.

This morning, I finally asked Coach E why he loves what he does so much. After thinking about it for a bit, he told me he just loved helping people. He loves watching individuals set goals and helping those folks achieve their goals, however long it may take.

As I was leaving the gym, I started thinking about how beautiful it is to hear people say they love helping others. It’s a generic enough term, and I think it can be taken as a cliche at times, but it’s extraordinary how broad ‘helping others’ stretches.

Firefighters help others, and so do teachers. Sales people help others, as do nurses and doctors. Pastors, missionaries, nonprofits, help desks - the list goes on and on. Everyone helping someone in some form or fashion. And that’s beautiful - that we’re all here in our jobs, helping. Hopefully you and I can always find the love in that.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: We’re all helping somebody, and when work sucks, dig deep to find the love in those you are helping.

Friendship with Dogs

In the city, you often seen people without homes standing on street corners holding signs, asking for money. These days, these people aren’t often as alone; many of them now have dogs to stand with them. And I used to think that was extremely wrong.

At one time in my life, I thought it was irresponsible for the homeless population to have companionship.
And that’s a terrible thought. It’s selfish and lacks empathy, understanding and wisdom, but it was a stage I went through.

I would say, “How can someone who can’t feed themself feed an animal? How can someone without a place to sleep take care of something else?” And I would miss the point entirely.

There is something extremely beautiful in the friendship between dog and man, and something even more beautiful in the friendship between a dog and a person experiencing homelessness. It is a picture and a glimpse into more of what humanity should look like.

Dogs don’t care what we look like or smell like. They don’t care what we do for a living, how much money we make or who is in our social circle. They just care about you and them, and they’re always happy to greet you, each time they see you. They want companionship and have empathy. Dog just seem to understand some things we don’t and see past things we see, without fear. And that’s beautiful.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Be a friend like man’s best friend.

Time Slippin' Away

The older I get, the faster time seems to go by.

That’s not a new thought, but it’s becoming a new truth each day.

This morning, I woke up, and I thought it was on time. It’s when I always wake up. But somehow, there wasn’t enough time. I had things I wanted to get done, but I got pre-occupied with other things. Things that shouldn’t take long, but do.

That’s on a task level, but on a life level, it’s even more dramatic.

I remember waiting for all of my friends to come over to our house on my 9th birthday. Everyone was supposed to arrive at 5p. That day felt like the longest day of my life. There was nothing I could do to make the time pass by. Waiting those 10 hours seemed to last forever, and my excitement only slowed every second.

Now, a 10 hour day goes by without me even realizing it. Half of the time time, I can barely remember what I did to occupy all of it. Work days run together, separated by clips of time known as weekends, which string together as months and ultimately years. Add those up and it’s been a lifetime, and once I get to that point, it’s easy to look back and ask, “What have I done with this time?” And it’s even harder to justify if I’ve used it well.

-Cliff

Cliff’s Note: Reflect on time to use it better.